The "Destitution Derby"

My take on what Brit Hume dubbed the "Destitution Derby", Democratic National Convention.

 I really, really,really tried to watch the speeches at the DNC, really.  I gave it my best effort but I guess that that wasn’t good enough because I couldn’t make it through one.  Thank G-d for written transcripts. I managed
to watch a few minutes of Michelle Obama’s and Mayor Castro’s and a few seconds
of Elizabeth Warren’s (Fauxcahontas) before throwing in the towel. I actually found myself sitting through a half-hour’s worth of Clinton’s magnum opus, but gave up when I realized I had no idea if he was at the halfway mark or was merely getting started. My overall reaction was that if someone had only thought to bring bread to the Convention, they could have made sandwiches for thousands with all the baloney on display.Even though I couldn’t stomach all the lies and insults directed at Republicans, I came away with a number of impressions. It all began on the days leading up to the Charlotte event when Maryland Governor Martin O’Malley first went on a Sunday news show and admitted that the American people were not better off than they were four years ago, and then turned up the next day insisting that of course the American people were better off. He might as
well have said, “Who are you going to believe? Me or me?” Best of all, the
Obama Chicago machine has become so adept at corralling  renegades 
(Corey Booker), you could barely see the bruises left by David Axelrod’s

On a bit of a side note you may have heard, there was reportedly an infestation of bed bugs at several of the Charlotte hotels. Noword as to whether they were native to North Carolina or if the liberals had brought them to town. For the Democrats, the good news is that thousands of them are now registered to vote for Obama in November.

After Clinton’s speech, I heard several pundits in the throes of orgasmic rapture insisting it was the greatest speech they’d ever heard.  Or at least since Michelle Obama had delivered her own version of the Sermon on the Mount the day before. Some went so far as to claim that Clinton had cinched Obama’s victory. My question is whether any of them is prepared to put his money where his mouth is. (Pause for effect)…..No, I didn’t think so.

Speaking of Mrs. Obama, she said that Republicans are the sort of people who climb the ladder of success and then slam the door on others. When I heard that, I wondered if one of us had been drinking. I mean, what ladder ends with a door? I’ve had quite a bit of experience climbing ladders even though I have vertigo but I’m not sure how much experience Mrs. Obama has so she just may not realize what climbing a ladder involves.  I’m not sure if the President had to use a ladder to climb into that dumpster to retrieve his coffee table either? 

I watched enough of the convention to have heard that the one thing that all Americans have in common is that we belong to the government. They played a video that whoever wrote the dialogue for it was laboring under the delusion that he was addressing the State Council for the People’s Republic of China.  The Obama campaign has issued the following statement via BuzzFeed: “The video in question was produced and paid for by the host committee of the city of Charlotte. It’s neither an OFA nor a DNC video, despite what the Romney campaign is claiming,  It’s time for them to find a new target for their faux outrage.”  Sounds fair but wait… appearing in the lower left hand corner were the words, “Democratic
National Convention”
. After all, this was the group that had to go through three
voice votes before Convention chairman Antonio Villaraigosa decided that “God”
and “Jerusalem” would be shoehorned into the Party Platform. Some cynics said
even on the third go-around, the “Ayes” didn’t come close to achieving the
required two-thirds vote. But it’s my theory that Villaraigosa, who’s not terribly
bright, figured that it was okay to add the first two votes to the third one in
order to reach the required number.  Let’s call it “Biden math”.

The real problem with Democratic politicians isn’t that they lie, but that they do it so badly that even the nitwits who vote for them know they’re lying. For instance, everyone realizes that Democrats, from the president on down are so deep into the pockets of the teachers union that they risk being buried in lint, never send their kids to public schools in Washington, D.C. Whenever they pay homage to the glory of public education, you can bet they have their fingers crossed and their own offspring safely ensconced in private schools.  Let’s not forget that Obama’s opposition to the D.C. voucher program that is allowing a couple of city kids to go to school with the first daughters.  And let us not forget that the same people who whine about the hardship that photo IDs pose for young people, blacks and Hispanics, insisted that photo IDs be required for all the conventioneers seeking to enter the Time Warner Cable Arena. Apparently, if you’re a left-winger, it only makes sense that attendingan event that features the likes of Sandra Fluke, Emanuel Cleaver and Valerie Jarrett (aka Ms. Rasputin), is a sacred privilege, whereas voting in a presidential election should be open to everyone, including illegal aliens, convicted felons, the deceased and of course, bed bugs.

The Democrats were so desperate to make their convention look jam-packed on TV, they rented a much smaller hall than the one the GOP used in Tampa. Even then, they had to bus in college students, union members and those who appeared in many cases to be out-patients from North Carolina psych wards, to fill the seats.  They then had to pray for rain as an excuse to cancel Obama’s speech in the football stadium that promised to draw an even smaller crowd than “Gigli,” the Jennifer Lopez-Ben Affleck movie that emptied more theaters than stink bombs and Rob Schneider put together. Of course the Democrats had to pretend that the change of venue was merely to safeguard the crowd from the dangers of lightning. In all fairness I wouldn’t want to stand anywhere near Barack Obama while he’s up there spinning lie after lie for fear of being struck by lightning.  And finally the most unhinged and delusional statement short of the delegate from New York that said that she wanted to kill Romney was uttered by another attendee when they claimed that if Ronald Reaganwere alive today, he’d be a Democrat. . At first that struck me as the absolute height of absurdity until it occurred to me that in all likelihood America’s second greatest president probably would be a Democrat.  Think about it, he’d be over 100 years old and he was suffering from Alzheimer’s.

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